@AnkCoupleTO: I'm always a little suspicious of women who say that they don't "remember things"
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@krishna_van: Woke up at 6 & went for a jog before hitting the gym for an hour. Now I'm back home, making up a bunch of absolute bullshit about my morning
@usermcuserface: At the library: Librarian: you have 45 cents in late fees. Me: (adjusts bow tie then slides 50 cents across the table) Keep the change
@MattyIceUS: So #Scaramucci lands a job, gets his boss fired, has a baby, gets a divorce, and is fired in the same week? Sounds like a Seinfeld episode.