@Kernsti: I'm always terrified when someone knocks on the door while I'm home alone as if murderers and burglars knock first
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@TwatWaffler69: You think you're going to win this? I've been acting out potential fake arguments in the shower for years. You don't stand a chance.
@chuuew: Is it okay for men to sit down to pee? The manager of this sofa store doesn't seem to think so.
@onion_an: Gf: Remember that night we had unprotected sex Me: Yeah Gf: I'm having twins Me suspiciously: We only did it once why's there two babies