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@DurtMcHurtt: I'm at my most Alzheimer's when Billy is that you?
@ka_unplugged: When I see an ugly guy buying condoms, I restore my faith in myself by thinking that he bought them only because balloons weren't available
@lovemyboots111: How do you know your man is cheating?
When he drives by her place the wifi connects
@In_Twittaland: 1% battery.....
Because I like to live on the
@MrSandeepP: Apparently saying, "You mad, bro?" is frowned upon if you work in customer service.
@TheBoydP: If you get nervous when the IT support desk takes control of your computer remember they're whispering "no weirdos please" to themselves.