@vanluvz1: I'm at my most nurturing when I'm plotting a way to drop my 12 yr old at school 3 days early.
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@briangaar: A 13-pound baby was born in GERMANY?? C'mon Mississippi, this is why we keep you around
@KimmyMonte: *phone rings* "Yeh hi who's this? Sure he's here hold on.. Drastic Measures! Call for u." "Who is it?" "Drastic Times" *crowd goes wild*
@mikejanson2: Q: How do you find Will Smith in the snow? A: You look for the fresh prints! I'll show myself out y'all