@AlisonLeiby: I'm calling Facebook "Mom" now because all it does is tell me who from my high school is engaged and remind me about my cousins' birthdays.
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@xJLynn: If a dentist makes his money off unheathly teeth,why should I trust a toothbrush 4 out of 5 dentist approve?
@electrolemon: "let's put computers and keyboards in our cars. now let's go catch all the people typing on tiny keyboards in their cars" - cops
@MrsFancyPants77: Once, just once, I'd like to be able to use the word skedaddling in an everyday conversation.
@maebemarbles: Not one person is cooler than the pigeon that just walked all the way into this Mexican restaurant, gently picked up a taco chip, and left.