@Hobo_Splendido: I'm crowd funding an organic lettuce purchase from Whole Foods.
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@msdanifernandez: Did you guys hear about the football player who hits women? No the other one. No the other one.
@DaddyJew: Doctor: are you an active marijuana user? Me: not really, I usually just sit on the couch and play video games
@theshantilly: Him: You're pretty obnoxious. You know that? Me: I'm sorry. All I heard was pretty.