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@Sleinso: I am at my most drunk when I go from chat room to chat room yelling WHO STOLE MY POPTART!!
@1Happytwit: I've been looking for the lid for this Tupperware container and somehow I'm now three weeks late for work.
@Poopy_Pizza_Pal: *grammar police reads ransom note* "Bring the money hear in too days, or she dead" *grammar cop dies* "Damn, he had 2 days until retirement"