@ItsDumbTweets: I'm dying right now 😂
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@kcmoore51: *puts arm around you* You've been burned before but, you're safe with me. Let your gaurd down, girl. *steals your pizza*
@caliluvgirl77: coworker: did you hear someone used all the charity money to buy snacks from the vending machine me: *laughing nervously* that's awful
@buhsbaby_baby: When you unfollow me, I find your name on a Coke bottle, shake it up, put it back on the shelf and whisper "suck it" under my breath.
@causticbob: If I were a Scooby Doo villain, I'd take the whole thing to court. How hard can it be to overturn the testimony of 4 kids who talk to a dog?