@My_Ego_Altered: I'm eating a bottle of glitter so when I get drunk and throw up tonight people will think I'm a unicorn in human form.
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@jimmytorosian: Pretty arrogant of Red Delicious Apples to put "delicious" in their name. Like calm down. You're still just an apple. You ain't no prize.
@GibJimson: [at pet store] Im looking for something cheap and will get people to stop coming over.
@ArfMeasures:  ME:Make it enormous "But if I paint a red cross on ur door, ppl will think you've got the plague & never visit" ME:Make it enormous