@KateWhineHall: I'm eating a vegan lunch today. Sure, it's six sleeves of Smarties and a Diet Coke, but I'm still better than you.
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@Jebo_te_patak: You say tomato, I say that's a weird thing to say for no reason. We were just sitting here quietly, and you're all "tomato." You can leave.
@Brampersandon_: WIFE: I just bought toilet paper. How are we out already? ME: *hiding dog that I wrapped up like a mummy* it's a mystery I guess
@SortaBad: [Native Americans see ship approach] Let's use fake names lol "Ha! I'll be Running Bear,u be Crazy Horse" lmao do u think they'll believe us
@Rainbowbunee: My gf & I are toying w/the idea of changing both of our last names rather than hyphenate Easier & we can have fun with it Mrs Velociraptor.