@just1fool: I'm excited for the zombie apocalypse so I can trap famous dead celebrities and make the best Broadway show ever assembled.
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@JKNenagh: My wife and I use the pull-out method of birth control where we pull out our phones and ignore each other every night
@internetluke: [restaurant] *motions for waiter* Waiter! Bill please! *Bill comes out & dances embarrassingly to entertain me & the guests* Thanks Bill!