@stewnami: I'm fat, so when I get mad, I get massive aggressive.
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@thecrabbyhook: You know how one lie leads to another? Well, to cut a long story short, my 7yo daughter now thinks she's allergic to owls.
@kelkulus: Women are like bacon, they smell great, taste delicious and kill you slowly. Men are like bacon because we're pigs.
@underchilde: We appreciate the 3 billion guys that signed up for our sex study, but unfortunately we only need five.