@sip_at_home_mom: I'm finally putting that giant exercise ball to use, and my core is hurting from laughing at Toddler Dodgeball.
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@iamspacegirl: if squids were land animals sometimes you'd be walking along and you'd look up and BAM squid in a tree
@Kendragarden: The waitress said they were out of pizza but then much later I saw a pizza come out to another table. (My super villain origin story)
@envydatropic: My greatest fear is that I'll be reported as a missing person and my family guesstimates my weight way higher than what I actually weigh
@Parker_Simpson: Why do people say,"You can't make this stuff up." Nope. Not true at all. You can literally make up anything you want anytime.