@KentWGraham: I’m forgetful. My wife is rememberful.
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@iresurfaced: I dropped my phone when my friend accidently bumped my arm. It didn't break but for a moment I saw her whole life flash in front of my eyes.
@MatCro: [office] DAVE: We're having a baby SUE: Congratulations! ME: [suspicious that Dave is a seahorse] Looking forward to the birth, Dave?
@_Ms_Moneypenny_: This salad isn't going to toss itself. *winks* - Things you shouldn't say as you pass food around the Thanksgiving table :(
@CliffDuffy: Becky on Facebook is having a bad hair day and wonders if anything will ever go right. Be strong Becky, be strong. Also shut up.