@SardonicTart: I'm glad my office has this giant shredder because otherwise I don't know what I'd do with all this work.
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@StrawburyDelite: Apparently, my office doesn't think the women's restroom needs a tampon disposal, so wrapped it up and put it in their suggestion box.
@JermHimselfish: Drank too much Red Bull and puked in some bushes, now three of them are breakdancing and one is taking me hang gliding next weekend.
@liv_thatsme: Me: 0. Grandma (who’s making me sit at the kids table because I “still don’t have a husband“): 1.