@markydoodoo: I'm gods gift to women if god only shopped at Rite Aid.
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@davedittell: WIFE: Dave's here HUSBAND: Dave from work or Dave who always wears scarves? ME: [from downstairs] I got caught in the ceiling fan again!
@funnybeachgirl: Kegels: because how else are you supposed to grind fresh coffee beans during a power outage?
@JediGigi: People whose TL is only quotes from famous people---You do realize you're not a desk calendar, right?