@RhinoUR: I'm Godzilla's gift to women!!!
*walks around toy store
destroying doll houses*
@aimlessamers: First date
Me: when you said you were a WWF fanatic, I thought you meant Words with Friends
Him:(in tights) YOU'RE GOING DOWN *flips table*
@ThaJawn: Angel: God.. Were you drunk creating last night?
Angel: *holds up platypus
God: a little..
@mattZillaaaa: I saw a younger couple walking and holding hands today and it reminded me that I need to buy a bottle of vodka.
@walks_on_legs: Throwing burgers around furniture because I have a hunch that termites only eat wood because they have not tried anything tastier.
@TheTweetOfGod: Life is a suicide mission.