@SamuelHLowe: I'm going to confess my love to this sore throat so it'll be gone when I wake up in the morning.
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@shkeeber: Her: 911, what's your emerge- Me: SOMEONE'S WEARING CROCS! Her: Sir, that's not an em- Me: WITH A FANNY PACK! Her: I'll send an officer.
@PhilJamesson: "Girl, are you a tree? cause-" "no i'm not a tree" "..cause i want-" "why are you still talking i'm not a tree" ".. i want t-" "not a tree"
@Donna_McCoy: My new table from Ikea is actually just the unopened box with a tablecloth thrown over it.