@2tickytacky: "I'm going to lay right here in the doorway and give people a dumb look as they trip over me."- Damned dog.... Could've been me though.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Jeffwni: [Ancient Egypt job centre] - Name? "Ankhesenamun" - How do you spell that? "Reed comb water Ankh, bendy straw water shitting priest"
@urfavoritejoel: I say "Hey man, I got your back." He thanks me until he collapses from being spineless. I give his back to an infant. "Baby got back." I say
@cookiesnweed: Get your shit together, people at McDonald's drive thru who sit there all confused like the menu hasn't been the same for the last 50 years