@alexjmann: I'm going to need to see a warrant before you look through any pictures on my phone besides the one I show you.
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@thetobbie: When jogging, if i get tired, I insult the people i pass in my head & then imagine having to get away as they chase me...
@madcaplaughs30: I hope this magician is good [curtain rises to reveal a man with no goatee] get your coats, children. that man is a fraud.
@Quartzjixler: There are many effective ways of inviting me to your event but doing it on Facebook is definitely not one of them.
@Kernsti: When my mom first saw my Facebook she was offended it said I was "interested in men" I think because she thought that was a list of hobbies