@remington3000: I'm going to open a restaurant and call it I Don't Care. So us men can finally take u women to the place u want to go to when we ask
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@causticbob: I was thrilled when this beautiful girl came up and asked me for a date. Then I realised it was just because I work at a dried fruit stand.
@FatherWithTwins: I asked my 5yo not to do something, and he just smiled maniacally and nodded his head until I gave up. I'm going to try this on my wife.
@SequelsWeWant: Twister 2: Climate change makes tornadoes evolve. They work together. We can't beat them. We team up instead The twisters destroy ISIS.
@LackOfShame: Have fun, but be careful. Your sister was vacuumed up last week, and yesterday your cousin was killed with a shoe. - spider moms, probably