@Dirty_Naomi: I'm going to start rubbing myself up against people when they've got nice food. If it works for my cat, it'll work for me.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@reczit: I'm afraid of people who keep smiling all the time. I feel like they still have plenty of space left for more bodies in their basement.
@jazmasta: "We suspect you may have inability to vocalise emotion disease" "I can't say I'm surprised" *doc strokes beard* "Hmm yes.Just as we thought"
@Ivsy01: A guy in line next to me just asked me to hold his coffee and I'm like I'm not looking for anything serious right now.
@sambaintv: How To Write: get as distracted as possible for as long as possible until you are driven to start typing by an overpowering sense of shame.