@OfNorthAmerica: I'm gonna make a photo editing type program that makes you look like a Hobbit and call it Frodoshop.
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@murrman5: *holding your xray up to the light and looking at it* when did you first notice your back hurting? "after the knife went in"
@ClaytonSykes: Revere rides a horse saying "The British are Coming"and it's heroic but I hop a pogo stick naked screaming "look at me"and it's probation?
@daemonic3: [grocery shopping] "Actually it should be 15 items or FEWER" I'll fix that sir [grabs mic] CUSTOMER NEEDS HELP FINDING EXTRA SMALL CONDOMS
@Feel_Dont_Speak: A friend will invite you for beers A good friend will pick up the tab A best friend will hold your hair All three will have blackmail pics