@E_lok44: I'm gonna nail horseshoes on my nikes and gallop behind joggers
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@CatherineLMK: Shaking hands is so weird: "Nice to meet you, have some germs and dead skin cells."
@xofreckles: You mean 'idiosyncrasies' doesn't mean two or more idiots doing the same thing at the same time?
@TheTweetOfGod: People keep asking Me why I created mosquitoes. To bite you repeatedly and give you malaria, that's why.
@LorieGZ: I ordered a pair of shoes delivered to my house. I'm too excited to wait at home so I'm camping out at the end of my street. Send snacks?