@CastAwayKristen: NO I didn't eat a whole box of Girl Scout Cookies. I just ate all the cookies inside it.

@jonnysun: the most efective way to clean ur room, start a creative project, run errands, cook, brush ur teeth and take a shower is to study for a exam

@GinAndJif: Girls, if you're gonna shave your eyebrows off just to draw them on again, at least make them interesting. How about drawing two umbrellas?

@mydmac: According to the law it's not appropriate to put a bounty on my boss. I actually thought it showed great initiative and leadership.

@Eenfidel: Godzilla on his smartphone, googling 'How many carbs does Tokyo have'