@Fruit_Slinger: I'm hungry but broke so I'm waiting for my bf to say he's hungry too than he'll order something delicious while I pretend to be indifferent.
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@Crutnacker: Biden: Showed Trump our terror briefings about Equestria. Obama: Equestria? Isn't that My Little Pony? Biden: 😉
@MatCro: NURSE: She's in a coma. She's been on hungerstrike [boyfriend walks in with just enough chips for himself] PATIENT: *Opens one eye*