@1evilidiot: I'm in a long distance relationship. My girlfriend's in the future.
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@DumbConfessions: [in Paris] Will you have sex with me? "No monsieur." Okay, like, I don't speak French. BLINK ONCE FOR NO AND TWICE FOR YES.
@canadasandra: [getting a massage] Me: I have tension in my lower back. *therapist begins* Me: Lower. Me: Lower. Th: But that's your a- Me: Lower!
@noog: Wolverine: You know what I can't heal? Jean: What Logan? Wolverine: A broken heart *professor x starts laughing from the other room*