@1evilidiot: I'm in a long distance relationship. My girlfriend's in the future.
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@Muath_tu: Apparently you can't get a sick leave just because you're sick of seeing everyone at the office.
@TheNardvark: Walmart stopped selling hoverboards due to safety concerns. In case you were curious about those empty shelves between the guns and the ammo
@causticbob: Breaking News. Apple is to buy Ireland to solve the debt problem. It will be rebranded iLand