@BadJordon: I'm just a boy, standing in front of the toilet paper aisle, trying to decide whether I want to wipe with a pillow, a cloud, or a kitten.
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@StarWarsProblms: [at the shooting range] Recruit: Sir, I missed every target. Officer: Perfect. *makes him a stormtrooper*
@myqkaplan: "should i go into the arts?" "can you imagine yourself doing anything else?" "no" "then i wouldn't go into the arts, with no imagination"
@SleazySli: What do you get when you cross a Centaur with a Minotaur? Cinnaminotaur. The most delicious of all mythological creatures.
@ArfMeasures: [Inventing Squash] FRIEND: What are you doing? ME: I just [smashes ball] really hate this wall FRIEND: u know what [grabs racket] so do I