@rocknthepurple: I'm just a girl, standing in front of half a pizza thinking it's been long enough since I ate the 1st half to consider this a different meal
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@N0pantz: Plan B and pregnancy tests should be sold at the Liquor Store as a 'one stop shop' kinda thing. Save all that judgment for one cashier.
@VeryLonelyLuke: I adopted a rock. He just sits there and does nothing all day. It still beats raising Kylo.
@kumailn: The director of "A Girl in the River" went to high school with me in Karachi! She won an Oscar! This is not gonna help w my parents. #Oscars
@BlairLoudly: One time I threw my cat at a spider so I could escape, but sure I'd love to hold your baby