@SteampunkMuppet: I’m literally crying
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@StansaidAirport: Do you like freezing to death and knocking down trees with your face? Well why not book a skiing holiday?
@MartaEffing: My date thinks he's gonna get me drunk, & then get in my pants. The joke is on him, coz my tolerance is sky high & I'm wearing a skirt.
@ninjadinosaur1: None of my Barbies are speaking to each other because Ken got Skipper pregnant again. You can imagine the tension in my house tonight.