@818Newbie: I'm never marrying anyone else that I find on craigslist.
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@SadPeruna: If I was a magician I'd ask someone in the audience for a $20 bill and then just run away. You could prob make like $40 doing that.
@ceejoyner: Our guide called the bear tracks I found bike tracks. Laugh it up pal, but if these bears are on bikes we're all going to die out here.
@davidkenny100: Date: Are you ready to take on another man's child? Me: yes Later- Date: This is.. *I knock her kid out with one punch Me: too easy!
@nuttywhippet: Ancient Chinese proverb: man who go to bed with itchy bottom, wake up with smelly finger.