@1Happytwit: I'm not a mechanic so I don't know why, but my car seems to make a screaming noise whenever I run over people.
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@outsmartedmommy: 7yo: Did you drink coffee before we were born? Me: Yes 7yo: Did you eat pancakes? Me: Yes 7yo: What didn't you do? Me: Talk while peeing.
@simoncholland: Hope my marriage can make it through another season of disagreement over the pronunciation of pecan.