@Rollinintheseat: I'm not above army crawling down an aisle at the grocery store to avoid small talk with an acquaintance.
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@Amusitr0n: [shady nighttime meeting at the aquarium] AQUARIUM EMPLOYEE: eels are already pretty slippery man ME: shut up and help me butter them
@HeyZeus666: At my age, my biggest fantasy is to sleep through the night without having to pee every two hours.
@Marlebean: I don't mean to sound racist, but why do all Chinese food takeout boxes look the same?