@carlyken: I'm not afraid of dying. I'm afraid of ending up in a nursing home with a roommate who has Justin Bieber posters and Twilight shirts.
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@Elizasoul80: I'm gonna hire a person to speak at my funeral and say a bunch of crazy stuff about me so my friends and family think I had a secret life.
@jctwritesstuff: *watching The Revenant* *rewind* *play* *rewind* *play* *rewind* *play* Him: What are you doing? Me: Taking notes for when I fight a bear.
@ilovepie84: I put a message in a bottle and threw it in the Ocean. The note said "I have Tuberculosis and I coughed in this bottle"