@weinerdog4life: I'm not allowed to use the credit card anymore, last month I bought 43 falcons
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@MichaelTrying: My behavior when there is a mosquito in the car while I’m driving suggests I am willing to die in order to kill a mosquito.
@Reverend_Scott: Principal: about your son... Dad: our son? Mom: is he ok?? Principal: yes, yes. but you see, we've found that your son is cool. very cool. far too cool to have parents like you. [hits the intercom] Betty, please bring them in. [Betty enters with cooler parents]
@msdanifernandez: His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy. There's vomit on his sweater already. WebMD: TYPHOID FEVER