@SavoirFail: I'm not asking questions for that friend anymore. Too embarrassing.
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@better_off_dad: 16: 'We should put a flat screen on the wall!' Wife: 'I really don't like mounting things.' Me: *mumbles 'No shit.' W: 'What was that??'
@ericonederful: Fellas, If you kill a spider while you're at her place, congratulations. You will be having sex. P.S. Bring a spider.
@DecantAndPour: I lost a very close friend and drinking buddy last week. She got her finger caught in a wedding ring.