@vulcan_kelly: I'm not being creepy but i can see thru my binoculars that your family portrait is hanging crooked on your wall
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@mrtimlong: Every time I raise my arm a little, a falcon lands on it. It was super-cool at first, but now I'm starting to get annoyed.
@zgbetty: This donut scented car air freshener is going to pay for itself next time I get pulled over.
@AliyanShaikh: Did you know? If you stand under the moonlight and say the name of your true love 3 times, you'll look really stupid.