@TrolleyCat: I'm not helping to save the environment until bears let me ride them around like cars. It's a group effort, bears.
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@jsaffle1: Funny how old trash yards always have so much razor wire on the fence If I want that trash bad enough no amount of razors will stop me
@iRowlf: It's pretty rude how they'll kick you out of the hospital just for using a defibrillator to make a grilled cheese sandwich.
@carlyken: The most important lesson I learned from watching The Muppet Show is when cooking meth always test your product on the drummer of the band