@Pat_Bren: "I'm not really a big dog person." - lying werewolf
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@KevinFarzad: Sick and tired of birds going to any concert they want for free. Maybe get a job and buy a ticket like the rest of us.
@novicefather: I played dead in the living room to see how my 2yo would respond. He climbed on my "corpse" for 5 minutes then turned on the tv.
@squirrel74wkgn: [news anchor] "Up next, can more sex lead to a healthier & happier-" *wife changes channel*