@SwoonTwang: I'm not slurring, I'm speaking in cursive.
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@Reverend_Scott: Fun Fact: Over 23.6% of relationships fail because one of the partners doesn't like The Princess Bride.
@Amburglar_: "Wow! Go show your mommy!" -what I say to any child talking to me for more than 11 seconds.
@ibid78: [plumber] well here's your problem.. *keeps pulling tied handkerchiefs from toilet* [magician] it was like that when I bought the house