@Poutymcgee: I'm not the kind of girl to get mad and throw a drink in your face....that's wasteful. I'd drink it first and then glass you.
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@UncleDuke1969: Daughter: Here you go! Me: You're my favorite. Son: Yesterday, you said I was your favorite! Me: Yesterday, you were closest to the remote.
@fillthevacuum: "Ohhh, that's what you meant by period sex" I say, removing my powdered wig and waistcoat.