@Cheeseboy22: I'm offended that horses don't put their hooves over their hearts during the National Anthem when they win a gold in equestrian events.
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@titusbb: I don't understand why people go to the gym all the time... everything there's so heavy.
@theyearofelan: Few things in life are more pleasurable than turning off the lights in a public bathroom while people are still inside
@13spencer: New Neighbor: Hi, I'm Derek; I moved in downstairs. Me: I'm Spencer; I'll be looking in your window and judging your decorating choices.