@fart: im online
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@Skullcat: When a big account that doesn't follow me stars me suddenly, I crouch down and stay still, hoping it will tiptoe up and eat from my hand.
@_TayTayJustine: Every time you reply to a text from your ex, Taylor Swift completes another album. Don't be an enabler. Drop the phone.
@jazmasta: Who called it confronting ur husband Stanley about flirty texts from a girl named Rebecca from a former soviet state and not Who'sbeckystan?