@TuffyNyC: I'm responsible for the deaths of 100's local singles in my area. They were dying to meet me & I did nothing. I did nothing!
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@Reverend_Scott: JUDGE: I find you guilty of murder. Sentenced to life. LAWYER: But it was only 20 minutes of murder. JUDGE: Oh, then you're free to go.
@treadmilld: Someone just honked their horn to get me out of my parking space quicker so now we will both be here until we're dead.
@ClickBaite: Watches my wife cut the 2 yr. olds apple juice with water ... *Hauntingly second guesses every drink she's ever mixed for me now