@jenlaw_11: I'm rubber, you're glue. I'm destroying the planet and you are made of dead horses
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@causticbob: If you're using public transport never give up your seat to an old lady... That's how I lost my job as a bus driver.
@Token_Geezer: Apparently, the sonogram machine is to see unborn babies in the womb I thought it was for making you age 10 years. Instantly
@Love_bug1016: Him: you watch too much Food Network Me: just enjoy your artisanal bread covered in a delectable berry compote Him: its toast and jelly