@shopkins776: I'm scared some kid is going to break into my house and fleek me to death with a bae
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@AwkwardTwitts: "Wow, you're tall.. Do you play basketball?" "Wow, you're short. Do you play mini golf?"
@cray_at_home_ma: There are actually only two stages of parenthood: having children, and having children who can reach things on countertops.