@snmrrw: i'm selfie-employed. yes sir i'll make a duck-face. right away sir.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ThisOneSayz: Me: sandwich for lunch? 6yo: noooo!!! Me: how about salami, tomatoes, cheese & bread? 6: YES!! I win.
@TheMichaelRock: The only way I want to see your ultrasound picture is if you're having a velociraptor.
@just1fool: I'm gonna insert "comedian" in my bio and have my picture taken on a stage with a microphone in my hand so no one will follow me back.
@Playing_Dad: [Divorce court] Judge: The reason you're divorcing is "he's annoying?" Wife: He pronounces “yikes” like “Nike" J: Baliff, throw him in jail