@TheBoydP: I’m “Since when did it become unacceptable for your socks to show” years old.
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@terio1429: Library charged my Visa $15.60 for my son's lost Dr. Seuss book. Teri got mad oh yes she did, Teri got angry and grounded her kid.
@Scott_A_Gilmore: Oh look! A guy with "Stand-Up Comic" in his bio unfollowed me two seconds after I followed back. That's never happened before.
@StinkyGr33n: Me: "Hey Siri, what color are your panties?" Siri: "Why would I be wearing panties?" Me: "Oh, you're such a naughty girl, Siri."
@OhNoSheTwitnt: How many people in America do you think I can trick into believing that Brexit is the name of one of Sarah Palin's kids?