@juneohara65: I'm smart but not "know when to stop eating" smart.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Me: Who ate all the cookies? 5-year-old: Ninjas. Me: I didn’t see them. 5-year-old: No one ever does. Checkmate.
@Bluestmoon_: When someone shows you they don't want to be a part of your life, let them go. I'm not saying you can't make a voodoo doll of them, though.
@bridger_w: Does anybody know what date Easter is this year? And if so, what are you, obsessed with Easter
@anylaurie16: 7 yo son asked how Grandpa got lung cancer. I said, "Well, he quit a long time ago, but for many many years, Grandpa played Minecraft."