@Heather2Go: I'm so bad with directions that every time I try to go to Pound Town I end up in the Friend Zone.
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@Elizasoul80: [God creating mosquitoes] "I wonder how I could get everyone to spray chemicals on themselves and also slap their own faces."
@jergarl: It's like my Grandpa used to say ,"The fight with grandma isn't over until I fill her pillow with spiders and she gives me back my teeth."
@MrAdamBez: *gets sentenced to 25 years in prison* *opens twitter app* *looks up* *being released*